Goodnight and Goodbye, Sweet Lily

Tuesday, February 26, 2013 with 7 comments

Today was one of the hardest I’ve been through. We knew this day would come sooner than later, and today, we said goodbye to our wonderful baby, Lily. We watched her closely this week, and each day as she regressed a little more, we knew it was time. She had progressed to the point where she no longer could navigate around the house (we think vision in both eyes were now affected), she seemed confused and weak, had trouble standing on her own, and didn’t even flinch when we mentioned “treats” or “hungry”. She no longer wagged her tail, and seemed to be so, so tired. She was tired of fighting.

I called on Saturday to make an appointment when it was clear that it was the right thing to do, and then prepared ourselves to say our final goodbyes. It was the hardest call I’ve had to make, and all weekend it clouded my thoughts to think about her leaving.

As the weather turned warmer this weekend, I took her outside and also looked for my opportunity to capture some final photos of her. She’s so beautiful, even when she’s sick and not feeling like herself. She picked this spot Sunday afternoon. Words can’t express how much I love this dog, and how much my heart aches with missing her.

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This morning we got Ben ready for school, and then Joe dropped him off while I stayed with Lily for a few more hours. He met me back at home, and we rode to the vet’s with Lily together. The hardest goodbye I’ve ever had to face. She went to sleep peacefully, finally relaxing and getting the rest that she needed, with Joe and I by her side.

It’s the small moments that are the hardest. The treat jar on the shelf, her favorite ball in the corner. The quiet of the house. No more padding of her feet, no more jingle of her collar. When I accidentally drop food on the floor, and look to call her to clean it up, and she’s not there. It’s the little things, that after nine years of having her underfoot and in my heart, that trigger the sadness all over again. She was so much a part of my life and my family that it just feels so empty without her here. There is definitely a hole in my heart that will take a long time to heal.

To the “seat stealer”, “baby bean”, “fun police”, “crazy dog”, “pie stealer”, “bean-bean”, “baby dog”, “baby girl”, “lovey”, “lickey-dog”, “smiley”, and “sweetheart”… we love you so much, and our hearts are breaking without you. We know you are in a better place now, with no more pain, and no more sorrow. I long to see the day again where I can feel your licks on my face and rub your velvet ears once more.

I know somewhere up there someone is giving you lots of belly rubs and tennis balls to chew.

Goodbye, baby girl.

filed under Lily, Public
7 comments
Carrie

    Comments




  • Brad Trankina


    It has been forever since we talked and I can’t believe it has been 9 years since Lily joined your life. Chris and I have read along and even though we haven’t talked it has been fun to know what you are up to.

    We have a dog that is a big part of our lives too…I think I will spend a little extra time with Jessie tonight. Take care Carrie!

  • Jenn


    My heart is aching for you guys. This is beautifully stated and I am so sorry about Lily. She was a wonderful dog. Losing a pet is painful. You were such a great dog mom and she was loved by so many. I’m grateful for the moments I was able to spend with her. She was a good girl. Hugs.

  • Heidi Howard


    Oh Carrie, I thought of you yesterday often. Having just lost my own dog on Sunday from an accident, I am certainly feeling your pain with you. I took Maddie to the vet for them to store her until the ground thaws and we will bury her here on our farm. That was a hard drive for me today. Its so hard to believe how they become such a huge part of our lives and grab hold of our hearts. My wish is that the days become easier for you, that you’ll be able to think of her without tears, and treasure the memories you have of her.

  • Anne


    I have tears running down my face.She has lived such a wonderful life with you. <3Big hug, Carrie.

  • Jean


    Carrie,

    I saw your post and just had to say how sorry I am for your loss. We lost our beloved almost 13 year old yellow lab Chloe just 3 weeks ago. To lymphoma – which seemed to come on so suddenly. I can literally remember her last walk and that the next day she didn’t move too much and started losing her appetite. 2 weeks after that day we had to make the hardest decision. We also put her to sleep so that she wouldn’t be in pain any longer. Missing her so much and I think it will hurt for a long time. She was our first “baby” and was so gentle and kind. Sweet and loving. She stepped back gracefully when our son was born almost 4 years after her. She brought so much to our family and our house too is so quiet. I know exactly how you feel – we miss her sounds, her feel, her beautiful and energetic spirit every day.

    I wish you peace through this first part of your loss.

    Jean

  • Suzanne


    I stumbled on this on the CM blog and I had clicked your name. I’m so sorry about the loss of your precious girl. The pictures are beautiful.

  • Carrie Ann Nelson


    Thank you Suzanne! She was a special lady, and I still miss her <3

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